I know. There are too many important things to talk about than sports. Like how Paris Hilton’s grandfather gave away 97% of the family’s inheritance to charity. Grandpa Hilton is, like, so cool. The Trampstick may have to flip burgers after all.

The scene of Calcutta Hilton working at Wendy’s is one to make us all smile.

As much as I’d like to speculate about how she may have reacted to the news, we do have a sports blog to run.

Maybe she can latch her snatch onto Lexington Steele - aka Tony Romo? I hear he’s into passé skanks.

This somehow leads me to Roger Clemens. Clemens recently said he was “numb” to all the allegations swirling around him and the Mitchell Report - must be all that Novacane, NyQuil and fish paralyzer.

Now Clemens; attorney is launching a probe into the Mitchell Report.

Where have I heard all this before? Oh yeah, first Peter Rose and his long lasting denials and then OJ Simpson who vowed to go and find the “real” murderers.